God Rides A Wooden Horse could be called the kindest and most goodly of warlocks, were it not for the fact that he is, in fact, a bully and a sadist. He is a master of life-magic-used-for-evil, and sells his services as a torturer at night, and an anesthesiologist during the day. He tells young men that he is writing a play that is also called God Rides A Wooden Horse, and takes them back to his tower. There he ties them to a pasta making machine and cuts their bodies into pieces, but his magic means that the bodies feel no pain and do not die.
HEATH LEDGER'S JOKER
Heath Ledger's Joker is a pleasant sort of sorcerer, who is known for his research into conjured blocks. Each block is roughly three feet to a side, and made of a dull red, waxy stone. For some unknown reason, devils find this hilarious, and will laugh and laugh when they see these blocks. Regardless of their comedic potential, these blocks are used to shore up damage to the city, and Heath Ledger's Joker has a steady employment with the devils. He sometimes sells rods capable of conjuring these blocks, although they have a limited number of charges before becoming inert. Heath Ledger's Joker is notoriously dull, and enjoys reading, alone, in his tall, spindly, and garishly mauve tower.
TERROR FELT SINCE BIRTH
Terror Felt Since Birth is called the Knight of Time, and enjoys, in equal parts, making and dismantling clocks, and jousting and falconry. He is popular with the high class ladies of Blighttown for his silver tongue, gallant manner, and poetry recitations. Recently, Terror Felt Since Birth created a spell which caused the statues of Blighttown to release the absorbed music they have heard in their existence, which they sang backwards at all hours of the night. As punishment, he is no longer allowed to eat the favorite food of devil's and sorcerers, which is to say, strawberries.
Ouroboros Prison is the gardner wizard, and owns a large rooftop manse in Blighttown, which he has, at great personal expense, covered in soil. Here he cultivates a massive, overgrown jungle, and, using his greatly specialized magic, has advanced the study of homunculi to the point where his garden is home to half a dozen miniscule cities of finger sized creatures. These homunculi are fully self-aware and work, play, love and die thinking that their garden is the extent of the universe. To disguise himself from his creations, Ouroboros Prison has changed himself into an ambulatory shrub. This form makes it difficult for him to sell the produce of his garden, but he is unconcerned, as he is quite content with clean air, water, and light, and has little need for money these days.